If Kalaignar were a Bihari

Aditya Sinha

First Published : 01 Nov 2008 01:38:00 AM IST
Last Updated : 01 Nov 2008 07:32:05 AM IST

Sometimes I wonder: what if Mr Kalaignar was a Bihari. He is, as you know, Tamil Nadu chief minister M Karunanidhi; I am, as regular readers know, an American Bihari.We have something in common: the Shiv Sena. The Sena was born mobilizing unemployed Marathis by demonizing the “Madrasi”. Now that Sena founder Bal Thackeray is close to croaking, his nephew Raj and son Uddhav are wrestling for his political inheritance by demonizing the “Bihari”.

In the way that “Madrasi” encompassed all south Indians during the Sena’s birth, “Bihari” includes everyone from the Gangetic belt. This is confusing. South Indians refer to all north Indians as “Punjabis”, so for the “Madrasi”, are Marathis and Biharis sub-sets of “Punjabis”? And why does the “Madrasi” refer to those from the Northeast (like my wife) as north Indians when “Punjabis” refer to them as “Chinkies”? Should we refer to Kashmiris as “Extremely North Indians”? Since Pakistan is dominated by Punjabis, are they a subset of north Indians too? And since Hema Malini and Sridevi both married Punjabis, are they traitors? But I digress. The attacks on Biharis will likely continue for another year, till the Maharashtra assembly elections are due. In part, this is because both Raj and Uddhav think their incontinent old man is going to pop it sometime soon; he was too “leaky” to travel to election meetings far from his house “Matoshri” in Bandra during the 2004 elections. Their fight for the soul of the Sena means a bit of economy with the truth: the Maharashtra state labour commission apparently says there is no fight for jobs between Marathis and Biharis; Marathis dominate government jobs, Biharis do the low-level stuff, and the private sector (which can’t be regulated through quotas) is dominated by the folks from Tamil Nadu and Kerala.

Could Raj and Uddhav be jumping the gun? After all, their old man is a couple of years younger than our Mr Kalaignar who, Brahmanical Gods willing, will torment India for many years to come. And he hasn’t lost his touch: he recently wrote in the Sena mouthpiece, Samna, that Biharis were “an unwanted lot” in the country, or that the 16 Bihar MPs who have threatened to resign were “spitting into the plate they ate from”. It seems that my wife is not the only one who thinks Biharis are unwanted.

In fact, till my wife and I met, she, like the ULFA, thought all Biharis were either tea garden labourers or rickshaw drivers. In Punjab, at the height of terrorism in the 1980s, extremists used to gun down Bihari migrant workers, though Punjabi entrepreneurs are now trying to woo Biharis back since their own people are too prosperous to do manual farm labour.
In Delhi, Biharis will soon overtake Punjabis as the capital’s largest ethnic group; that the BJP has chosen a Punjabi candidate, V K Malhotra, for CM means the Biharis are likely to vote for Mayawati and thereby split the Congress tally. Even CM Sheila Dixit last year spoke of how “these Biharis” came to Delhi and stayed on.

Even in America. While I grew up, other Indian youngsters used to snort when I revealed I was from Bihar (you’d think that Indians would display more unity living halfway across the globe). Once, feeling demoralized I told my father, and he counseled me to buck up; “Tell them about Bihar’s ancient culture,” he said. “How it was the birthplace of Buddhism, and the centre of the empire of Chandragupta Maurya, the first unifier of India.” In fact,my parents are currently visiting from America; my mother comes annually for Chhath puja, this year on Tuesday night and Wednesday morning, the same time as the US presidential elections (anyway they would have split their votes between Obama and McCain). Chhath entails worship of the Sun; it is said to have started in the Mahabharata with Karna, the son of Kunti by the Sun God. Biharis celebrate it wherever they migrate to; in New York, my mother tells me, one of her friends does Chhath on the banks of the Hudson River. Though my mother stopped going to Bihar for Chhath during the lawless years of Laloo Prasad’s reign, she did the puja in Delhi, where I used to live.
In fact, the 16 MPs who were protesting against Raj Thackeray’s behaviour and who demanded a CBI inquiry into the police shooting of an angry young migrant, said they would quit Parliament after Chhath.

My father and I were watching the announcement on TV and I laughed; I further laughed when I saw Raj Thackeray ask his supporters not to disrupt Chhath in Maharashtra.
The resignation threat was as sincere as the recent DMK threat to resign (thereby threatening to pull down the UPA government) in case India did not ensure a ceasefire in Sri Lanka.
But Karunanidhi seems to have had his cake and eat it too. He gets away with his hypocrisy and remains the “champion” of Tamil Eelam, simply because there is nobody else to inherit his mantle (sons Stalin and Azhagiri are no patch on Raj and Uddhav, so Chennai’s Biharis need not worry).

After him, there will be a real crisis of leadership in opposition to Jayalalithaa. If Vaiko or Ramadoss were capable of the top job, they would have somehow got it by now; if they have not, they will never.Vijaykanth does not seem to have any depth, relying for advice on the discards from other parties.

He seems like nothing more than a popular face. Plus, he has no neck.

And if Karunanidhi had roared against the attacks against Biharis,would Raj or Uddhav have had the temerity to tell him to mind his own business, the way they did to Laloo or chief minister Nitish Kumar? Probably not. Of course, Mr Kalaignar takes his alpha-male role too seriously when he throws stones at women, the way his gang did at Jayalalithaa in Madurai on Thursday. His support to Tamil Eelam remains just a lot of lip service, done to ensure his family’s political and business survival, as the coming months may prove. And with Laloo around, Bihar isn’t big enough for two kalaignars.

Last week, my wife scolded me for bragging about my American heritage. I did it because Obama’s words made me proud of that heritage. The USA is lucky to have a leader like him. India’s luck can be gauged by the transcendence of its Thackerays, Laloos, Kalaignars, Amar Singhs, Sonias, Advanis, et al. Our luck is further eroded by the fact that we have a prime minister who is incapable of politically managing this vast land. I don’t buy the theory that at any given time, a chunk of India wants to secede. I think we lack the visionary leaders we had at independence, men and women who forged a nation out of so many peoples.

And if you want to see who’s to blame, you need just look in the mirror!.

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